The Journey Within: Presidential Speech 08: My Commitment versus My Fear

Tonight, if you expect me to deliver a Presidential speech to you, I afraid I am going to disappoint you. I decided to be selfish. I want to deliver this speech to myself.

Alan, are you willing to commit in building the training business you always wanted? No? I knew it!

If I ask you why you do not commit, you tell me "I am very busy." Oh ya, sometimes you gave me better reason: "Let us keep the options open." To me, those are bullshit. Utter bullshit.

Alan, face the fact. You are a serial quitter - jumping from one project to the next. You bail on the first sign of challenge and difficulty.

You know what is really driving your aversion to long-term commitment, Alan? It is fear. Fear, pure and simple. Your fear is debilitating you from achieving long term goals. If you want to break this cycle, then do not be an ostrich! Face your fear head on!

Here are the truths why you are not committed:

You are afraid of missing out
You are afraid of accountability
You are afraid to fail
You are afraid of boredom

You are afraid of missing out

You are afraid that if you commit to one thing, you will miss out better opportunities. So you think you are clever by keeping your options wide open. You think you are playing smart by hedging your bets well. By not intentionally choosing a path, you got into where you are right now: a rat race. Truly I tell you this: You will end up going nowhere.

My dear brother Alan, there is no escaping opportunity cost, whether you decide or not. You are holding back because of fear, now it is time to take the leap ad make a definite choice. Go back to IRONMAN training you have always wanted to finish. Build the business you always wanted. Commit to the promises that you made to others. Be a man of word!

You are afraid of accountability

Accountability makes commitment work. But you afraid of accountability because it feels like you are sacrificing your freedom. Face it, Alan. You do not like answering to others. So, you think you can be accountable to yourself. But this rarely works by itself. You need proof? What happened to your IRONMAN training? I rest my case.

My dear brother Alan, discipline equals freedom. Accountability is not a restraining chain. It is the fuel that will rocket you to achieve the things you really want. When you take responsibility for your actions, you have ownership over your life. Have trusted friends and partners who will speak truth to you. They will keep you rooted when you stray away from the path you set for yourself.

You are afraid to fail

You justified yourself in not setting big goals because it felt 'arrogant'. What a false humility! The truth is you are afraid of failing. You are afraid of looking foolish to yourself and others for even trying. You and your stupid arrogant ego! No wonder you are where you are right now. Serve you right! You kept asking for moratorium relief, struggling to earn more for you family who deserved better!

You know this. Failure is necessary part of the journey. Without failure, there can be no success. Moreover, the biggest value in setting goals is not achievement of goal itself. It is the personal growth you will experience while pursuing big goals. Focus on the gains that you have made, rather than on gap you fall short. And you will be inspired to make new commitment. You know this, and you preach this in your Friendship Toastmaster Club. Walk your talk, brother!

You are afraid of boredom

Alan, you get bored much more easily than others. When you commit to do something long-term, it is very likely you need to do the same steps repeatedly to achieve mastery. But before you can get to mastery level, there is a huge, messy middle of challenges and boredom. And you are not prepared at all for this stage. That's why you bail from commitment at the first sign of difficulty!

My dear brother Alan, know that there will come to a point when novelty and excitement will wear off. Do anticipate and prepare for this. Go back to your "why" for committing to your long term goal. Remind yourself on the stake you lose if you quit. Remind yourself what is possible if you choose to press on. These will help you to survive the messy middle. Don't talk about 4 Path of Mastery! Get your "Why" in the first place! Otherwise you are just a hypocrite!

When you cut through the noise of not committing, it boils down to single reason: fear. My brother Alan, learn to flex your commitment muscle, and you will learn to face your fears head on. Know the reasons why you are not committing: You are afraid of missing out, accountability, you are afraid to fail and afraid of boredom. Set high goals for yourself. And you will be well on your way to achieve them.

It is said "Better is an open reprimand of loving correction than a love that is hidden". My brother Alan, thank you for being such a wonderful audience. I shall end my speech here.

By the authority of Toastmasters International vested in me, mandate given by club members as president, guided by commitment leads to actions, I hereby declare our meeting officially starts.

20 October 2020.