I speak, I
write to illuminate each corner of my darkness, to make me feel my inner self that
is still alive– Madhuparna Mishra
I speak, I write till no words left for the swan’s song if I leave. – Sandesh
August 2020. Sabah State Assembly was just dissolved. I was the Club President of Friendship Toastmasters Club then. I received a phone call while I was preparing for our meeting.
“Is this Alan Oh?”
“My name is Handsome Lau. I got your contact from Jacy Wee, Money & You Toastmasters Club.”
“Handsome?” Gosh. Can’t believe someone who is so thick-skinned.
“No. Hanson.”
“Ok. Hanson. How can I assist you?”
“We are chartering a new Toastmasters Club. Would you like to explore that?” After about 10 mins conversation, I agreed to attend demo meeting.
After 5 -6
demo meetings, our Club was finally chartered. KLBL Toastmasters Club. Dr
Sawiah was instrumental in getting the formidable, convincing and undisputable ‘numbers’
in.
2020 - 2021 was one of my emotionally and financially challenged year in my life. I was loss, lost and lose in most of the aspects in my life. The feeling of thoroughly defeated in life was overwhelming. In fact, overwhelming was an understatement. But I hang on to the faith that there will be a way out and seek earnestly for opportunities to breakthrough.
I was
assigned as mentor for Group 4 - Hermes. As days went by, I witnessed the transformation
that Mara had. Dira was seeking earnestly for her inner peace and she managed
to find pieces of it. Grace, kept trying to overcome her communication
challenges. Eventually she did. Lina became a powerful storyteller. Oh ya, I edited the Stevie’s
wedding speech. He told me there was magic in my script. But, where is the very magical change I was looking for?
Throughout
these very challenging period of time, I must thank Hanson and Naza. Both of
them engaged me for my market research expertise to assist their clients. The
fees that I received, was sufficient for me to cover some critical expenses of
my family. More importantly, the money I received protected my ego as a man and
a father from further bruises. Man, is supposed to provide and protect his
family. That’s our heavenly mandate.
Till January 2021, if my memory serves me correctly, Dr Sawiah shared about sexual transmutation. As a lecherous, impure and lustful man, that caught my attention. In fact, deep attention. I pondered, meditated, thinking about it. Ya right, man only thinking about sex. I totally agree with it. I studied earnestly on sexual transmutation, but the breakthrough that I seek was still nowhere to be seen.
A year
later, the Enlightenment moment came. Sexual transmutation is about seeking wisdom
of pleasure!! I pieced up the puzzles of sexual transmutation process, overcame my
guilt. I began to experience breakthrough that I was seeking for. The right
people, solutions and wealth began to pour in. I finally understood and know
how to harness the real power of my raw libido. Since then, my life began to
move into new trajectory. For better.
I owe a huge debt to KLBL TMC members. I know I am not the “typical” “polite” “no-sex-religion-politic” kind of Toastmasters. I do not fit in the bill. But yet, the members here are such a wonderful audience. You all provided me a safe space for me to innovate, to ponder, to experiment new genre of speeches, pushing the boundaries of “typical” Toastmasters. In fact, the members here had unleashed my creativity potential. For that, I’m eternally grateful.
I sincerely appreciate the friendship I had in this Club. Special mentions to Hanson, Naza, Dr Sawiah, Mara, Mey and Dira. I will always remember the deep, intellectual conversations we had. And I do find Cambodian ladies are absolutely brilliant, charming and.... sensual in their very own unique ways.
The demand
of family, business and life continues to grow as I moved into the orbit of
next phase growth. I made a choice. To seek new growth financially and in
character so that I can bring prosperity to my family, and create new values
for the people around me. I know that I will not be able to commit to the
requirement set by our Club in terms of attendance. The rules must be enforced for
the benefit of community regardless their status. Otherwise, the very culture
of my beloved KLBL will crumble. As such, I made a tough decision to go on sabbatical.
Thank you KLBL TMC, for journeying with me during the toughest time for my life. I owe it to the Club. Please, should the Club need my assistance, please let me know. I am available for drink and definitely a warm hugs from ladies. Ya, gentlemen too.
I speak, I write to illuminate each corner of my dark, to make me feel my inner self that is still alive. I speak, I write till no words left for the swan’s song if I leave.
Till then....
